Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Lenting 13: Ponderous Asking Thoughts

You ever have a lot of questions that you'd love to just ask?..shamelessly, no fear of them being out of line or embarrassing.

I do. All the time. Truth be known, sometimes I do ask. Come to find out, it's mostly not a big deal to the answeree.

Yesterday, for example, a very, very tall man was standing beside me. TALL. And I felt very short.

With relatively little hesitancy I asked, "Sir, can I ask you a question?"

"Six foot seven." He didn't hesitate to respond with a valuable answer at least! However, that wasn't really what I was going for.

"Oh, wow, that's great," I said applaudingly. "I was really wondering though whether you felt as tall right now as I feel short." I think that caught him off guard a bit because I think that he answered that question again with a close-ish answer.

There were laughs. And to be honest, because there were laughs I was okay with the turn out.

We are just people with one life. Sometimes if I don't ask the question I'm thinking to the person near me I might miss a sweet moment. Sweet moments, gosh they are fabulous. Worth the risk so far, but never easier.

However, I've noticed the closer I am with someone the more I hesitate. Not everyone. When you receive enough blunt questions from Mom, you start to ask some yourself.

You ever hesitate to ask Jesus questions? Really, do you? I do. Why when He says to ask.

Matthew 7:8 "But whoever ask receives, whoever seeks finds, whoever knocks the door will be opened to them."

"If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." Matthew 21:22

And, Jesus has the right to answer somewhat like Tall Tom; a different answer than I expect.

But really, I fear the cost of losing respect and appreciation from someone that's let me enter their life; and them, mine. Or, what if my question is unwelcomed? Or, what if my question doesn't come out right? Or, what if I'm asking for too much? Too little?

Knowing that there are certainly moments to keep it shut, I just am thoughtful now of what holds me back. Others back.

Yea, i've had some bad experiences. Some well deserved, and others not.

To end my thoughts. God, can you please help me, help us to ask You what we want to? Need to? By the way, can You help us trust Your response?



Lana Joy said...

These thoughts are wonderful, Calli. I find myself in a similar spot oftentimes, too. I want to ask...but I wait. And the hesitation always ruins the real moment in which it would have been OK to ask. You can ask me anything, sister. And I will answer as best I can. I'm going to ponder your thoughts about us asking Jesus questions, as well. I know there are times when I hesitate with him...and why would we, when he really, truly does have all the answers?

Calli said...

You said it! It is interesting too the strength that we find to ask and seek by seeing others do the same. It's sure freeing.

May we strive to ask together, sister! Especially Jesus. And, questions are welcomed likewise. I will say though, it's pretty easy to ask you questions. Pretty much a lot of fun too. :)